Subversive Creation in New Directions

I've been doing activist theatre for a while and it's been fun, but I'd like to broaden the range of what I performancewise. I was at this great storytelling/performance gathering in May, and I read a couple of poems, sang a song and did a monologue. I'd like to do more of that sort of thing. I've been working on some issues of a zine (see below for details)- many of the poems there can be found on the Weaving a Web of Poems blog, but there's other stuff too. Anyway, I hope to do performances to promote them, and also move in directions- I'm feeling restless, and a bit stuck in some ways, so- time to break out of the moment.


Vol. 1, No. 1- Learning Life's Lessons, or Creating and Recreating Reality

Here, a montreal paul tries to sum up Life, the Universe and Everything in a mere 14 pages. He fails, of course (that's why there are further numbers in this series), but so what? It is what it is- some poems, some scattered verse, some drawings, and some musings on plastic bags and on whether anything means anything anyway.

includes: Childhood Lessons, Consolation amidst Desolation, Doomed & Delusional, Some Thoughts on Direction, Something of Beauty, Subversive Creation, The Springtime


Vol. 1, No. 2- Telling Stories: Truth or Dare

Ambition gets the bettter of a montreal paul here- this no. 2's almost twice as long as no. 1 (26 pages!). The theme is the telling of stories, and a number of stories are told here in which a montreal paul's shall we say "offbeat" sense of humour emerges. There are stories about mysterious silent phone calls from a charity, about a flag-hating kleptomaniac and his early morning bonfire, and about unsustainable development on the moon, among others.

includes: By the Dawn's Early Light, Lies & Life, Telling Stories, That Day, There is a War, Words and Worlds


Vol. 1, No. 3- Just a Matter of Time

If you're going to waste your time anyway, why not waste it reading about how a totally new day is like, totally about to dawn...or not. Is the end nigh? Surely not-our love will last forever. Things end, and then they come around again. a montreal paul wastes his time and ours in grand style by writing about wasting time in the countryside, in the city (with a camera), and in a waiting room (without a camera but with a decade-old magazine).

includes: Forever and a Day, The Way Forward (Rant No. 378), Revolution in Circles, Hanging out at the CLSC, Memories


Coming soon:

Vol. 1, No. 4- Impressions of People Making Impressions on People

This time it's mostly poems, often accompanied by drawings. I really like the cover, if I do so say so myself. It's my favourite of the covers so far. Some of the contents may be sketchier, depending on your point of view, but they're a pretty honest reflection of the range of emotions people can arouse in me as well as in other people. Includes one "outside" poem, written by one A.J. Klein (or is that two A.J. Kleins?).

Greetings from Gaspé!

Business has brought me out to the town of Gaspé, which is overcast at the moment but still quite nice. The clouds parted long enough to allow for a fantastic sunset.

The sun, sun, sun has come out! Yipee!

Well, OK, this day's been grimly grey with unrelenting rain, but tommorrow is another day.

I have a tendency to write in response to whatever's passing through my mind. But sometimes, it's something starting to come to the surface. So, I start writing, stirring things up, releasing more of those emotions... and only once I've finished does the full impact hit me. Hopefully it will be worth it.

Strange Sense of Déjà Vu

Once again, the days are getting shorter and cooler, the crispness of autumn is setting in. (Though today it's the grey damp chill of autumn, but why not look at the bright side? As long as I'm not looking outside, that might just work!) Already the fall term has started at Dawson College, where I work, and it will soon begin at Concordia, from which I live only blocks away.

Speaking of Concordia, it will be interesting to see what happens there this fall, given the events of the past summer. You can bet the administration will be trying to clamp down on people to avoid "incidents" such those that have besmirched its name in the past. Already QPIRG Concordia has been informed that no "controversial" activities will be permitted in the Hall Building. No controversy, please, we're a place of higher learning.

Sunny day spent in part walking to relieve the anxiety- enjoying the sunshine, doing a bit of work here and there. I got to Parc Lafontaine, and realized there was a Quebecois folk festival happening there, so I enjoyed some small bits of that.

I've finished the third issue of my little zine. I love it, but it's a lot of work to put together, and I did three issues over the summer. I'll slow down on it now- the next one I'll try to do for October or November, and then have one in January.

Feelin' pretty good. It was good times this evening- good friends, good food, good talkin'.

Still, I've been kind of nervy lately. Not sure why, could it be that I'm trying to avoid dealing with some issue head on? The emotions become deadened when the waves of anxiety shake my foundations. I'll need to get more securely centred in some meditative practices. Still, there's always the fear of finding the centre and finding nothing there. What can I say? Fears can be irrational, and can sometimes go out of their way to miss the point....

Some restructuring

I've just done some blog restructuring. I think of "Words and Things" mainly as a sort of electronic scrapbook, and I felt that the political articles were disrupting the flow. So I've taken those articles out and put them in a new blog, "Informed Insights or Carping Commentaries". I already started a poetry blog too, so that makes three now in operation. (see my profile to access the other blogs)

Every now and then, let the gravity be lightened by levity

I`ve been putting some poems online (Weave a Web of Poems). Plus, I put together a rather silly Montreal travelogue called Adventures in Wasted Time.

A Joke to Lighten the Mood

And now, a break from the heavy philosophizing about politics, war and the nature of evil. Here’s a joke someone showed me at work:

“One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although unfamiliar with the lake, the wide decides to tale the boat out herself. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book. Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman, and says:

“Good morning, Ma’am. What are you are you doing?”
“Reading a book”, she replies, a bit impatiently. Isn’t it obvious?
“You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area”, he informs her solemnly.
“I’m sorry officer”, she replies, “but as you can see, I’m not fishing. I’m reading.”
“Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start any moment. I’ll have to take you in and write you up.”
“If you do that, I’ll have to charge you with sexual assault.”
“But I haven’t even touched you!”, objects the game warden.
“That’s true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know, you could start at any moment.”
“Have a nice day, ma’am”, says the game warden, who promptly makes his escape.

Another silly picture I did a while back....actually,
my mother draws in a rather similar style...I'm just more shameless than she is.

Adventures in Wasted Time

Once upon a time, a montreal paul decided to spend some time aimlessly walking….It was a Sunday afternoon…a good time to have a good time wasting time, tasting it, savouring its sweet flavour as it flows through one’s consciousness

It was a windy day

I walked by lovers,
enjoying an enchanted Sunday afternoon together,
enjoying each other.

Soon enough, I came upon a sculpture celebrating the romantic story of Goldilocks and the Three Bares. She tried all three: One was two hot; the second was too cold- but the third was just right. And they lived happily ever after.

Goldilocks doesn't appear in the sculpture. She is whoever is seeing it.

I passed by a university disguised as a church.In modern-day Montreal, it seems the church is just a front- a front for all kinds of activities...

Montreal is a relatively safe city. Just watch out for the airborne muggers, swooping down on unsuspecting travellers from the air- a fact well known to the city's sculptors. Their works are often misinterpeted.

I wandered...and wandered...and wandered.To the east I wandered- well, to the north-east, which is east for Montreal, for Montreal is a city on an island in a river flowing north-east- but it seems like east to us.

My aimless travels took me into the evening hours, and into the neighbourhood of Hochelaga-Maisonneuve. Some intrepid explorers have ventured this far east, yet this is terra incognita for many Montrealers of the anglo variety, for whom the city ends at St. Denis or possibly at Parc Lafontaine. South of the Olympic Stadium, north of the St. Lawrence River, this exotic neighbourhood boasts at least one street with street lamps unlike any other in Montreal.

These reassuringly glowing beacons beckon the weary traveller, holding out the promise of exiting new worlds, heretofore unknown, to be found down this street.

Unfortunately, the street in fact quickly ends in an impasse. And so there was nothing left for me to do but return home. Well, that kept me occupied for a few hours anyway....

As you may have noticed, statues play an important role in telling the story of our city, and in showing a side of it that other people won't touch. Other people? You may have noticed that some of the people depicted in earlier photos are in fact statues. Indeed...and why not? If you prick them, do they not bleed? Well, OK, no, but...I tell you, their apparent lifelessness is just a ruse- they're quietly watching us, biding their time, waiting for their moment...are you laughing at me? I tell you, the day is coming when the statues will come to life and wreck terrible vengeance- them and the store mannequins. I've never trusted those store mannequins. And who'll be laughing then? Not me, I'll be too busy screaming. But at least I'll be vindicated. So there.

I got a really nice, thick pocket notebook at the Concordia Bookstore yesterday (not that I'm a Concordia student- not that there's anything wrong with that- I just live near Concordia). I swear by pocket notebooks. Honestly, I think that many people don't realise how many interesting things they have to say. I mean, I've heard them saying them! I often am inspired by things other people say. But they could so easily be inspired by their own thoughts and what other people say. Instead, I run off with their ideas. Sometimes it feels a bit like stealing. They just don't think about it that way, though. I guess other things are more important to them. But I love writing things- I love creating things in that way. I carry around a notebook so I can write down my thoughts and ideas. For me, the trick is not to have an idea. Ideas come easily. The trick is to remember it.

Actually, that's just the first trick. The next trick is to figure out what to do with it. That's where the work comes in.

The thirs zine, "Just a Matter of Time", is almost ready. Only a matter of actually putting it together (layout & printing & a bit more design & illustration)

Spent most of today just walking and practing guitar...that's all...and enjoying the sun. Gorgeous late summer weather here in Montreal. Really love the Sunday brunch at Eaux Vives ( a vegan restaurant- I'm not vegan, but it's great). Oh, and I wrote a song, "In a Sense", which is a bit odd, but you know, so am I.

Supposedly there's going to be a ceasefire in Lebanon. But Israel, which has defined its entire campaign as being a "defensive" attack on Hezbollah's military capabilities, says that while of course it agrees to the ceasefire, it reserves the right to launch further "defensive" attacks on Hezbollah's military capabilities (which have so far been defined rather broadly, to put it charitably). Meanwhile, Hezbollah, which has defined its activities as being "resistance" against Isreali attack, says it will abide by the ceasefire, but....it reserves the right to continue resisting Israel's presence in Lebanon.

Somehow I don't hold out much hope for this ceasefire. Man, I hope I'm wrong...

Syd (Roger) Barrett (1946-2006)

One summer, I bought Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon album. I was only about the 20 millionth person to do so.

The following summer, I got their very first album, The Piper at the Gates of Dawn, which came out in the summer of 1967, shortly after the Beatles' Sgt. Pepper. I'd already heard a couple of Syd Barrett songs - "Arnold Layne", "See Emily Play" and "Bike", but Piper was my full immersion into the delirious world of Barrett's Pink Floyd- a music that promised magic, that broke off on unexpected turns, that celebrated chaos as chaos by throwing so much in there that it theatened to overwhelm the structures of the song, and yet he could make it all make sense in a strange kind of way. He wrote songs that painted impressionistic pictures in words and music. Many also showed his offbeat sense of humour. He had a playful way with words- he played with them, with their sounds, with the impressions they can leave in the mind.

That world of words and music survives on recordings, but in real life, it lasted for only a brief time. Soon enough, Barrett began to experience some sort of mental breakdown- unable to cope with the pressure he was under, muddled by drugs, finding it harder to deal with people, he began to withdraw into himself. His songs became darker and less coherent- but still evocative. Increasingly, he sounds lost and alone:

It's awfully considerate of you to think of me here,
and I'm most obliged to you for making it clear that I'm not here
("Jugband Blues")

That song, by the way, is an example of chaos starting to overwhelm form- it starts off quietly enough, but then gathers up manic momentum, before suddenly dissolving into sonic chaos, including the sound of a Salvation Army band playing apparently at random- which then screeches abruptly to a halt, whereupon the song returns to the quiet of the beginning only to end, abruptly, with the lines "And what exactly is a dream? And what exactly is a joke?".

After he was thrown out of Pink Floyd, he made a couple of solo albums, which have brilliant moments but too often he's clearly not together- he often can't focus enough to do a really good performance. Still, the songs themselves are great for the most part, with evocatively impressionistic lyrics, and the simple yet unconventional chord sequences that are a trademark of Barrett's songwriting style

He made no records after 1970, and did no shows after 1972. Although in later years he appeared to have recovered somewhat from his breakdown, he was no longer "Syd" ("Syd" was his nickname)- he was Roger- trying to live as ordinary life as he could under the circumstances, keeping to himself mostly. Dealing with people was not the easiest thing for him.

As a songwriter, Syd Barrett came up with only a small body of work, and certainly not a body of recognized "classics" that everyone knows (if not loves). His work is obscure and yet the subject of a fervent cult following. Why is this of any importance to me?

Somehow, what he did spoke to me and speaks to me deeply- that surreal, playful imagination shows me a way to be a creative person. There are other paths in, of course- but there was a time when I couldn't see any for me. It's great when you come across things that open up imaginable possibilities like that.

History,

His story,

Her story,

Their story,

Our story,

Power and glory, radiating

as people get down to hating, and people get badly hurt, but we forget and we avert our eyes, and when symptoms arise we express surprise- and we say, "what does all this have to do with us anyway?"

Setting his sights high....



Picture taken by my brother

Zine update

If anyone coming across this is inspired by any of the titles from September onward, or has something relating to any of them, I do accept submissions ( write to: a_mtl_paul)

Subversive Creation available issues

June- Learning Life's Lessons, or Creating and Recreating Reality
July- Telling Stories: Truth or Dare


Subversive Creation upcoming issues (tentative)

Aug.- Just a Matter of Time
Sept.- Letting Go
Oct.- Impressions of People Making Impressions on People
Nov.- Control Your Destiny! Gather Power and Strike with Power for Security
Dec.- Believing is Seeing

I'm not sure what this says about the international situation, or about anything else. I just like the colours, man, yeah, like.... the colours...wow. I drew this years ago, when things were not so differant- just enough. Just enough for what? Ah, there you have me. Can I have myself back now? I was getting worried there for a moment...

The Time for Peace is Now

I went to a demonstration for peace in Lebanon yesterday (to clarify: the peace is to be in Lebanon- and Israel- but the demo was in Montreal, starting from Parc Lafontaine). It was much larger than the last one I was at- tens of thousands of people were there. It was great weather for a demo- blue skies & sunshine.

I had mixed feelings about some of the chants, especially since there were supporters of Hezbollah in the crowd who had their own chants equating Hezbollah with resistance (for more on that, see http://in-carcom.blogspot.com/2006/08/previous-political-postings.html).

Still, people have a right to express themselves. If people can hold rallies cheering on the IDF as it commits wholesale destruction of civilan infrastructure (and civilians), then surely people have the right to express support for Hezbollah. And who's to say that supporting Hezbollah is worse than supporting Israel in this conflict? It's just more "respectable", that's all- a sad comment, that.

What I Did On My Summer Vacation

My account of my recent travels, featuring themes of loss (hat, money, shoes), acceptance of loss, and feeling so lucky all the same.

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Day 1- July 29, 2006 (Friday): Heading to Tadoussac

My trip is finally beginning. I was supposed to wake up at 4:30 this morning to take the 6 o’clock to Quebec, but I made a mistake in setting the alarm. This is the second-time in the last couple of weeks that this happened. A week or so ago, I missed in an early morning "worry burning" thing that a friend of mine had going (as part of his birthday celebration) at the crack of down on Mount Royal. I guess there’s a part of me that just objects to getting up that early.

I’ll need to develop and then scan photos I take during this trip, as I don’t yet have a digital camera. I’m doing some writing and planning for future issues of my zine on the bus.

Afternoon- Short stopover in Quebec City. Ended up mainly sticking near the station as storm clouds threatened (but never made good on their threat). Also had to sort things out with the B&B in Tadoussac since I’ll be arriving there later than expected (about 9:30 this evening). There’s a nice park and a market (where I had an ice cream) near the bus station, and I had lunch at a nearby restaurant. Practiced my guitar in the park.

Late afternoon- Internet addiction withdrawal! There was a Bell internet station at the bus stayion ($2 for 10 min.!) It didn’t work. I tried telling myself I didn’t need to check my email.


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Day 2- July 30, 2006 (Saturday): Watching Whales/Much Sand, Sun & Wind in Tadoussac



Went whale watching this morning. It was a really good day for it. Very good visibility, many whales, several kinds. Fun to be out on the water too- it's actually cold! It was also cold on the ferry crossing to Tadoussac. I did feel some motion sickness- just a slight queaziness and trouble keeping balanced.



Walked along the beach this afternoon, saw the whale museum and went to see some sand dunes in the evening. The weather's been glorious- they were predicting showers today, and indeed ominous clouds did gather this morning, but they moved on soon enough.



email addiction update- there's an internet café here in Tadoussac! It's a nice café too- a bit like l'Utopik, though more touristy. This town's a real tourist town at this time of year.




The accomodation's pretty basic, although the staff are pleasant people.

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Day 3- July 30, 2006 (Sunday, Hallelujah!): Ferries, buses & hiking in the sunshine (from Tadoussac to Pointe-à-la Croix)




The ferry to Baie Ste. Catherine: It's glorious- the sunshine forming brilliant points of light on the water, under a clear blue sky, between two juttings out of land, where the Saguenay and St. Lawrence rivers meet (this is actually the sea though- the water is salty and there are tides here). Far across the St. Lawrence, I can see the faded blue outlines of distant mountains. (unfortunately, my camera wasn't available, so this description'll have to do).

I had to use my ticket to Quebec just to get to St. Simeon, because of my rather haphazard (even whimsical) approach to travel planning. I find it hard to travel this sort of thing, at home, in the abstract- at least when I'm out there, it's easier to see the problem that needs solving- how to get to the next place. Even bus companies, which are more flexible than train companies, don't work along with that..

Riviere-de-Loup bus station: The ferry across from St. Simeon to Rivere-de-Loup took about an hour, then I had to hike into town, which took about another hour. At the bus station I bought the tickets I need for the next leg of the jouney.

The weather's been glorious so far- sunshine and blue skies, with wispy white clouds here and there, cool refereshing breezes (well, winds really- actually the wind blew my hat off- I think it now resides somewhere at the bottom of the Tadoussac harbour or the river). The countryside here is beautiful.

Rimouski bus station (4:55 PM): Does being in unfamilar territory sharpen the senses? I feel more aware and more present here than I did back in Mtl. When you're not so familar with the place and how things happen here, I guess you need to keep your wits about you to a certain extent. It also helps that isn't terribly hot + humid in these here parts.

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Day 4- July 31, 2006 (Monday) : Extra day at the Bay des Chaleurs



2 PM (New Brunswick Time)- So here I am in New Brunswick (Campbellton). Another adventure. I neglected to find out when the bus through New Brunwick was passing through town- I arrived late, and then I has a leisurely early-to-mid morning, having a wonderful breakfast languidly observing two hummingbirds hovering at high speed at the feeder on the porch, blissfully unaware that I was missing the bus and would have to spend an unplanned extra day around the Baie de Chaleurs.




The folks at the B&B at Pointe-a-la-Croix (La Maison Verte- a great place) were very helpful- thanks to them I got a room in Campbellton, just across the bay. Campbellton's quite a nice place, as you may have noticed from the photos.






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Day 5- August 1, 2006 (Tuesday): Through New Brunswick



late morning- Spent a really comfy night and breakfast at McKenzie House, here in Campbellton. Now on the bus, heading down New Brunswick. It's another sunny day- there's hardly a cloud in the sky. The landscape here doesn't seem quite as interesting as in Gaspesie, though.

My hostess said at breakfast today that the main employer in the Campbellton area is a pulp and paper factory. The jobs are well-paying, but the industry's in a precarious state these days, and it seems the factory could close at any time. But in fact, even having the fafctory around isn't that great- it emits noxious, toxic pollutants into the air, and the people who work there tend to get pretty sick soon after retirement. Cancers are common.

How are communities like this to survive? Should we try to keep these factories open? But then, aren't we encouraging practices involving the destruction of nature and the poisoning of people? But if we don't, what can we do to make such communities both economically and environmentally sustainable?

This morning I finally finished Life of Pi, and then promptly lost it. Seems somehow appropriate. Maybe someone else'll find it and read it.

What is the value of a story- does a "better" story carry more truth, or meaning, or whatever? Hmmm....

12:35 PM- Short stop in Bathurst. Nice place. No place to quickly get lunch though. Got an ice cream instead. Mint and chocolate, mmm....

afternoon- "Chinese and Canadian cuisine"- seen on the front of a restaurant as we pull into another town. I don't want to be unpatriotic or anything, but just what is Canadian cuisine?

Can't get this Paul Simon song out of my mind- "Look At That". That's what tourist travelling is, isn't it?

Sackville, N.B., 10 PM (N.B. time)- I'm in a very nice B&B now (see photo above)- one of these old country houses, my room is quite large and luxurious- far better than a hotel, and cheaper too. Earlier had a brief stopover in Moncton, and I actually was in the first real city downtown during this trip. (It's really only a few blocks, but whatever) I bought The Globe and Mail- big mistake, it got me riled up. Keep me away from the daily paper! I will only say this: I sincerely hope that Canadians won't fall for the sleazy Conservative spin doctors who treat us as sheep who only seek leaders with clear directions to follow, never mind the details. Luckily, it now looks like we're not falling for it.
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Day 6- August 2, 2006 (Wednesday)- Sunshine, Shoes, Heat & Mud



Mmmm.....the taste of amoretto gelato lingers on my lips....uh, where was I? Oh, yes, here I was, and here I am, sitting dazed on the Mt. Alison campus. It's really hot in the sun now, so I'm sticking to the shade, and moving slowwwly. I'm reliably informed that this merciful wind blows from the Bay of Fundy...yes, yes, that's it...mmmmm....



This morning I got to an inlet coming in from the bay, only it was a trickle because it was low tide and because it was stopped up by a dike over which the Trans-Canada Highway runs , onward to Nova Scotia. And there I did a rather stupid thing. Attracted by the maritime air, I came in closer to this inlet, through the rushes, into the mudflat by the inlet. This was described by the local tourist office, I later found, as "the glistening expanse of mud deposited by the Fundy tides". Sounds alluring, but beware! for the mud turned out to be like quicksand, and seconds after I ventured into it, I found that one of my feet was stuck. I wrenched it out of my shoe. I tried to pull the shoe out, but to no avail. It's now, as I write, becoming one with the Fundy Bay muck. With some difficulty I got out of there and found myself with one shoe and two socks, all covered in mud. I decided to walk back to the B&B barefoot.


It was a slow walk, especially where I had to walk over pebbles. It was quite a bit quicker when I had to walk over ashphalt. It was a meditative experience- you have to be in the moment, making sure you know where your feet are treading. D'you know, I actually enjoyed it. I left my other shoe at the roadside- there seemed to be little point in hanging onto it.

A pity about the shoes, of course, but, well, maybe it's the heat and sun getting to me, but I don't really care- I can buy a new pair. Or can I? Not so easy to find a place that sells shoes in small-town Brunswick if you don't have a car. But the Salvation Army was my salvation- for lo, I espied a thrift store, to which I did then proceed on unclad feet, and there, having taken hold of a pair of ratty second-hand sandals, did proceed to purchase them for the price of $4.95 (tax included). Here endeth the lesson.

Earlier in the morning I went to another wetland where I didn't try to muck about in the muck- it was the Sackville Waterfowl Park (see photos above). I saw ducks, geese and other waterfowl, but I was more impressed with the birdsong- the differant calls weaving in and out of the soundscape- a time of peace, enjoyment, and rising heat.

I'm exhausted now. I've had a good trip and I'm about ready to go home. I can't do any more hiking in these sandals anyway. And did I already mention that it's really hot in the sun? Ah, another embrace from the maritime wind...yes, yes, that's it....

There's actually some cultural stuff happening here, but my timing was off and I'm missing it. This weekend there's some interesting stuff going on, like this midsummer music festival. But I've got to be in Montreal on Friday. Oh well...

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Day 7 (+1/2)- August 3-4, 2006 (Thursday): The Journey Home

Well, the title sounds grand, but anyone looking for exiting adventure is bound to be disapponted. After all, what we're looking at here is 18 hours mostly spent on the bus, some of it spent trying to sleep, but ending up with the half-sleep that doesn't rest you but at least means you're not conscious for the sheer tedium of a nighttime bus ride. On the bright side, though, remember that when travelling, an exiting ending is not necessarily a happy one.

THE END