But really, aren't all large companies tools of Satan?

Proctor & Gamble not in league with Satan, US court rules

It sounds like this would have been an interesting trial to follow. Did they attempt to subpeona the Devil? They should have, but you know how it is - people in positions of great power are generally spared such indignities at the hands of the law. How else can one explain the fact that Dick Cheney is still at large?